Slow Care

They should really call the Quick Care, "Slow Care."  I stumbled in yesterday afternoon with pain so bad I could hardly breathe.  I knew the drill, "I have severe pain in my abdomen," I said, knowing that the quick care is like a game of Chutes and Ladders and "abdominal pain" is a fast pass to the front of the line.  "You've got about seven people in front of you, feel better," was all the receptionist could tell me.

 

Seventh?!  I was already in a poor state, but to add defeat was just cruel.  I didn't think I could make it.  I'm not exactly tough when it comes to being in pain.  I'm actually a huge wimp.  I cry, I want someone to take care of me, and I vomit... a lot, and sometimes I pass out.  I decided to embrace my pain, to really feel it, and let everyone else know I was feeling it.

 

I went into the co-ed/public restroom of the Slow Care waiting room.  I took off my shoes and laid down on the cold tile floor, with no regard for pee stains or germs.  About every two minutes or so, I would vomit, and then curl up into a seated position to ward off more nausea.  This position didn't help with the pain, however, in fact, it made it worse.  In between bouts of loud crying/wailing/moaning, I would crawl over to the door, open it, shout to the front desk, "is it my turn?!" and with every no, I would shut the door and repeat the process.  I'm sure the sight was truly pitiful.

 

I was finally called back, and begged the triage nurse for "something, anything for the pain."  Instead she gave me a pregnancy test.  My attempts at listing the myriad of reasons I knew I was not pregnant were futile and once we had the actual results, I was finally given a shot to ease the pain.  Have you ever had a shot in the bum?!  It was my first, and let me tell you, it was unpleasant!  I couldn't determine which pain I'd rather deal with, the stabbing pain in my back or the throbbing in my tush.   After about 15 minutes I felt wonderful.  I was finally able to stop crying, come out of the fetal position and allow the nurses to perform some more tests.  Diagnosis: kidney stone. 

 

This isn't my first rodeo when it comes to kidney stones, it's my 5th.  I know all about taking it easy, and drinking lots of fluids.  It also helped that I had a really good nurse to take care of me.