5.15.2009
Apparently, it gets better.
This morning I began all last minute packing, shopping and grooming for my cruise. I decided that while I'm in the sun, swimming, and on beautiful beaches for next 10 days or so I did not want to worry about shaving. I've been "lady waxed" once before, but I wasn't keen on paying $75 every session. However Kirsten recommended me to her place and they have great deals/memberships/first time discounts etc., so I went. Today I had an appointment to get everything from my armpits to toes taken off. Needless to say this morning I was a bit nervous. So took a few IB Proufin to help calm my nerves... OK I took 4.
I walked in, expecting a spa like atmosphere (and got one). I expected to be taken to my room where I'd strip down in private and then lay on a bed with a strategically placed towel/blanket so the "artist" could see what they were doing, but not see everything.
Wrong!
I was led into a room, and then told, "OK, get naked" while my wax-est stood right there! I was mortified! Once on the bed, still mortified, she began by misting me with something smelly-good and then spreading warm wax on me in super long strips. It was almost relaxing!!! Then...
RRRRRIIIIPPPP
Owww! OOOOOO! AAAHH! EEEEEK! GUUUHHHH!!! Shriiieeekk!!
This lady could not stop laughing at me! Apparently I sounded like a cartoon with all my sound effects. I said to her, "This is not pleasant, doesn't everybody make "owwie" noises?" She then replied that most women make sex noises and think it feels good. Are you kidding me???!!!! Feels Good?!?! I definitely could relate to Steve Carell screaming every obscenity in the book, and I probably would have yelled Kelly Clarkson's name too had I had the strength to do so. All I could manage were one syllable onomatopoeias, with pants of suffering in between!
After about an hour I was done. At last! I was told not to wear deodorant or put on lotion for the rest of the day. I didn't plan on it. I hurt so bad I didn't want to touch anything south of my neck! Too bad I had to work tonight or I wouldn't have even let clothes touch my raw, red, swollen skin.
Apparently the first time is the worst, and it gets A LOT better the next time. I'm not sure I believe that...
Women, we are nuts. and the old saying is true Beauty is Pain!!!
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