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5.19.2011

Some days I hate everything



Yesterday, I had a moment of weakness.  A rare moment of vulnerability, and I hated it, but I needed it.  I was in the car and the song "Wonderful" by Everclear came on the radio.  As I sang along and listened to the words, it hit me.  I completely relate to this song, in a way I never have before.  My parents first separated three years ago, and their divorce was finalized last December.  It still hasn't gotten easier, and I am still learing to deal with it.  As the song came to the end,

♫ ... I don't want to start over again
I just want my life to be the same
Just like it used to be
Some days, I hate everything
I hate everything
Everyone and everything  ♫
I did the only thing I knew how to do.  I pulled my car over, and cried.  I cried for a good four minutes, and then realized that I felt stupid, and that other drivers probably thought I was nuts.  I don't wish my parents were still together, I realize that things are better this way.  A lot of blessings have come out of this change, including stronger relationships with most of my family members.  But still, it's hard sometimes.

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1 comment:

  1. I'm so sorry...no matter our age, it is hard. ALSO, i LOVE the picture today...your "photographer's" reflection in the picture is fun!

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