Return To Sender

One thing I love about packages is that no one knows what is on the inside. I discovered today that this is not always a good thing...

Let me explain.

A few weeks ago my computer stopped working. Read all about it here. Thinking I know everything, I got on Ebay and ordered a new battery.

I have since talked to Hewlett Packard and they were able to diagnose the problem (it was not the battery), and they are working to fix it.

Moving on. The battery arrived in the mail today, I headed to the post office to return it. When I got to the counter, the nice postal worker asked if the contents of my package were OK to ship. I noticed the "Dangerous Goods/Do Not Ship" poster behind her. On it was a picture of a lithium battery. Before answering I hesitated {this isn't a AA or D type of battery, so it should be OK, right?}. She must have noticed my hesitation, because she asked me again if my package was OK to ship. I said yes, and then she got serious.

"Does your package require batteries?"

Is this lady psychic? I half-lied and said no {batteries don't require batteries so it wasn't a full lie}.

Now, she looked annoyed. "Are you sure this envelope isn't going to 'go off' or anything?"

Confused, I said no, and then inquired as to why she was asking.

This is what the package looked like:

(Please excuse poor iPhone quality photo)

Postal lady thought I was shipping "a woman's personal massager," and wanted to make sure all batteries were removed so that my package wouldn't cause any unnecessary "vibrations." Rest assured Bomb squad, it's just a battery.